Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Whirling,Twirling and rolling

It's past midnight now, just when I'm supposed to be putting on my nightcap, my thinking cap chooses to plop itself on my head.

These past days, I've been thinking about a multitude of things. This post is going to be filled with a bundle of jumbled thoughts, so forgive the choppiness to come.

In quiet times like these, I find myself wondering about what's out there. Is there more to life than just waking up everyday and making the best of your days? Does love really exist? What are the possibilities for seemingly platonic relationships to blossom into something promising? When I was younger, I used to think that we were all puppets and our lives were all mapped out for us already. I used to think that God was the owner of all the puppets and every little action on our part was actually governed by Him. Not far off from the truth I must say.

I kinda hate it when people judge other people before they even get to know the person on a more personal level. It's really stupid to draw conclusions based on a person's look. It doesn't make any blinking sense ! I mean, your portly looking, boring next door neighbour might turn out to be the coolest guy on earth and your hip looking trendy colleague might turn out to be the biggest bore on earth. I hate it when people make assumptions, because assumptions are rarely right and all they ever do is muddle up the situation more. Ironically, sometimes, I myself fall victim to such vices. Oh man, I'm going round in circles and I don't know what I'm talking about. My innermost feelings are too senstive to be written out in the open like this.

Have you ever experienced that jolt of anticipation everytime the phone rings? Just because you're expecting or rather waiting for that one call? And when at last the phone rings, you grab it up only to be dissapointed because whoever's on the line isn't who you want it to be? It's as if you've reached the peak of a mountain and suddenly, you lose your footage and come stumbling down. Jack and Jill-like. And sometimes, you say things only to be struck by your own audacity...It's funny how we let ourselves revel in all this see-sawing emotions and let them mess with our brains. Even weirder how sometimes the hardest of cynics lose his or her cynicsm and fall for the one thing they were against. In a way, that's what being human entails. We can't fight the forces of nature. There's simply no going against it. We're just little specks in a gargantuan(is there even such a word? nevermind) universe. Defenceless, pitiable and very much human.

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