Sunday, September 06, 2009

Teardrops and rainbows

Today's Smile-Inducer : Joseph McElderry!!! His rendition of Luther VanDross's Dance With My Father again made me cry. So sweet so sweet ! Go youtube him if you haven't already!

I've been in a contemplative mood lately. I've always wondered what awaits me at the end of the road. Will I be happy with the long twisting road that led me there? Will the end be rewarding? Optimists would nod enthusiastically in the affirmative, but what if after years and years and years of toiling and suffering you realize the end is not what you envisioned it to be afterall? I've managed to maintain my CGPA right up till my final year but all I feel is that I've lost 3 and a half years of life's lessons. I need to go out there, feel the world, make some mistakes, live on the wild side, BE young but I've been too overcome with what the world deems 'achievement'. I'm tired of tear dampened pillows and pent up frustrations, it's time I start living for myself. Rainbows and sunshine will I hunt!

There's a sense of ennui around me now. Maybe it's that time of the month. Or maybe all that exam buzz and high is messing up my psychological make up and its driving me nuts. I need a break. Sandy beaches and rolling waves, when will we meet again?

Do you ever get the feeling that time slips through your fingers and the tighter you grasp it the faster it falls out?


owl_order said...

i dunno, i kinda find my life ok now. i do the things i like. spend like 15 hours a weekend doing chinese calligraphy, and when i'm at home i usually entertain my family with the piano.

i'm the kinda person who worries a lot too, but i remind myself that if i don't land myself in a respectable engineering company in the future (which is what i have in mind now), i can do something different. like art. or entertainment. or even bakery (FYI i don't cook at all). you're a much talented person and as long as you don't make some stupid decisions (which i doubt you will) you'll probably be very successful in the future!

don't worry, it's just the exam stress. i was feeling so depressed during my first exam in UNMC i almost cried for the first time in years.

wishing you the best of luck =)

Joanna said...


Thank you so much for leaving your thoughts here. It's nice you've found your outlet for expression through art and music.

I'm all better now. I guess it took a bit of shaking up to see things clearly =D

Oh, and ps. I didn't know you BAKE !! Cool !!!

owl_order said...

i DON'T bake. i was just saying if everything fails, one of the things i can try is baking.

i do like baked goods though, especially bread and buns =D. i can finish 3 loaves of bread myself in like four days haha

Magician said...

'go out there, feel the world, make some mistakes, live on the wild side' haha.. u'hv positive thinking too. btw, mistake is vry 'aggressive' , it will find u itself. purposely doin mistake wont b a good idea..