The not-so-clandestine Affair

Some guys are loyal and faithful, some simply aren't. But most men have often split their attention between more than one per time. If there's one thing a girl can't take, it'll be sharing her guy with someone else. Here's how I know I'm not the only one on The Boy's mind..

• He spends much more time with her than he does with me
• He knows what makes her tick, every nook and cranny, inside out
• He treats her with gentleness and utmost care
• He touches her with reverence, tenderness and obvious love and affection
• He brings her EVERYWHERE he goes
• He takes her on late nights out and they sometimes sit together and watch the sunrise
• He is possessive over her. Thou shalt not lay thy paws anywhere on her body without permission. Thou shalt be rewarded with curses worse than the usual 'dumbass'
• He is overly protective over her. Any scoundrel idiotic enough to come too close to her or so much as kiss any part of her shall be beheaded, chewed on and spat out like Wrigley's chewing gum
• He's attentive to her needs. Treats her to generous meals, sighing in contentment at her purr of satisfaction
• Her presence is always felt on all our dates
• He pays meticulous attention to her every moan and groan of protest

And these are the reasons why I can never beat her

• She has gorgeous legs. In fact, they literally run for miles.
• She has curves in all the right places, making her sexy in a hot blooded guy's eyes the way I will never be
• She eats gallons and doesn't put on so much as an inch
• She does exactly as bidden

And worse of all.........I come after her on his list of priorities.....*sniffles

But despite it all, I still love you baby....that is, after my shoes and handbags of course *flutters lashes

P.s : The info above has since been changed but this was before the wrath descended upon the poor unsuspecting boy..............=p