Saturday, May 20, 2006

Bits and pieces

Life is just a phase....you'll get over it - Anon.



This may be the last post I post in a while. When was the last time I blogged? Bout a week ago? It's been an eventful week for sure. One of the fastest to pass. I went to check out my hostel last Sunday. I've got over the initial shock and unease. One thing's for sure, I'm SO NOT looking forward to staying there. I've been wishing the days would crawl by, but so far, all time seems to be doing is zooming past. Right now, I've psycho-ed myself to treat it all as an adventure. Imagine one day, decades and decades away, I'd be telling my grandkids (if I ever get married to begin with) how I survived on baked beans, lived in a room none bigger than a matchbox, shared a communal bathroom, took cold baths at dawn, climbed 5 flights of stairs a few times daily, walked miles everyday, lived without a TV set nearby, did my own 'budgeting' , and lived 'independantly'. = p

I must say that I was taught geography at the dining table at a very tender age. Well, here's an example.. when I was younger, I used to love to pick at my food. So mum would go, " Joanna, eat your rice, do you know how many children in Africa/Bosnia are starving? Do you know how much they would love and appreciate having spinach to eat? You are so lucky.....so don't be so fussy" So to me, Africa was the country mum speaks of whenever I refuse to eat something yucky. Nutritious food's always yucky aren't they? I remember mum forcing me to 'eat' cod liver oil. Mind you, when I was around 5, cod liver oil meant the emulsion form. No gold capsules because mum was afraid I'd choke myself to death. And gawd did that icky white cod liver oil emulsion taste awful ! Things that mum called 'brain food' , I translated into 'run away quick' food. So 'brain boosting sessions' usually resulted in a battle of wills, and a chase round and under the dining table.

Looking through my autograph book today, I realised how much I missed school and how dear all those sweet memories in school meant to me. I used to think mum and dad were kidding or were just acting 'parenty' when they told me 'Schooldays are the best ! You'll miss it when you graduate'' Now, I know what they mean. Reading what friends wrote opened up the dam of memories once again. While bittersweet memories pooled and flooded around me, it felt as if I was back in school again. It was like a picturebook in my mind, where happy scenes are replaying themselves. It's sad to see phrases like " It's our last year together this year, I still remember when......." or " It's time to bid farewell and go on our own journeys''. Sometimes I wish I could go back there again, but in life we always have to move forward don't we? Many of my friends have started Form 6, some have gone overseas, some have gone to college. We've all spread our wings and took flight. I can't help but wonder what's going on in my friends' lives. It's almost sinful how we took our time together for granted. But Kim's autograph sent me into peals of laughter. It just demonstrates how unpredictable life could be at times.

Ah, well, it's time I embarked on my own journey, to explore foreign lands and terrains. It's times like these that I think of my grandmother. I wonder whether she knows what's happening in my life, I wonder whether she's proud of me, whether she knows all I've done and achieved, my accomplishments and failures. When I see her again, I'll tell her that I've done a lot of growing up in the time she left, but some things still remain the same. I'm still afraid of the dark, I still pick at my food, I still misplace my watch often, I still believe in ghosts and refuse to watch horror movies, and I've graduated from Enid Blyton to the likes of Sandra Brown and Sidney Sheldon, but I still get stuck in what Josh terms 'bookland' . I don't squabble with Josh so often now. Maybe that's what they meant by 'maturity', but then again, maybe it's because we see so little of each other, there's hardly time to take out the artillery and declare war before time comes and whisks it all away....

I guess that's all I have to say right now. I started out with lots to say but words just evades me. Till I get near a computer in the near future, Adieu !

1 comment:

Jarod said...

OMG! the kid with the blue bunny! that's the cousin i remembered. who're the others? never seen them before but strangely familiar...